Monday, November 26, 2007

What is Co-Dependence

* My good feelings about who I am stem from being loved by you.
* My good feelings about who I am stem from receiving approval from you.
* Your struggle affects my serenity. My mental attention focuses on solving your problems or relieving your pain.
* My mental attention is focused on pleasing you.
* My mental attention is focused on protecting you.
* My self-esteem is bolstered by solving your problems.
* My self-esteem is bolstered by relieving your pain.
* My own hobbies and interests are put aside. My time is spent sharing your interests and hobbies.
* Your clothing and personal appearance are dictated by my desires as I feel you are a reflection of me.
* Your behavior is dictated by my desires as I feel you are a reflection of me.
* I am not aware of how I feel. I am aware of how you feel.
* I am not aware of what I want -- I ask what you want. I am not aware -- I assume.
* The dreams I have for my future are linked to you.
* My fear of rejection determines what I say or do.
* My fear of your anger determines what I say or do.
* I use giving as a way of feeling safe in our relationship.
* My social circle diminishes as I involve myself with you.
* I put my values aside in order to connect with you.
* I value your opinion and way of doing things more than my own.
* The quality of my life is in direct relation to the quality of yours.

THERE IS A SOLUTION
By working through the eight recovery principles found in the Beatitudes with Jesus Christ as your Higher Power, you can and will change! You will begin to experience the true peace and serenity you have been seeking, and you will no longer have to rely on your codependent behaviors as a temporary "fix" for your pain.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Is Celebrate Recovery for You?

What is a hurt, habit or hang-up?
Abuse, Alcohol, Divorce, Anger, Tobacco, Co-Dependency, Drugs, Sex, Pornography, Need to Control, Care-taking, Compulsive Behavior, Depression…

Anything that hinders our walk with God!

Everyone is welcome
Wednesday Nights
7:00pm
McKnight Road Church of Christ
St. Louis, Missouri

Call 314-974-0873 for more information

Monday, November 19, 2007

Daily Recovery Checklist

When you're on the road to recovery, how do you keep from falling back into your old ways? Take a look at the following checklist.

Post your comments about what helps you!

1. In the morning pray, ask God to help keep you from your hurt, habit or hang-up.

2. Read the Bible, other inspirational books, and informational literature on your specific area of recovery.

3. Call someone in recovery and stay accountable.

4. Go to a recovery meeting, Bible study, or meet with your accountability partner...get fed daily!

5. In the evening pray, thank God for helping you throughout the day.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

4th Step Spiritual Inventory

Whew! It was great to get together and work on our fourth step inventories. I think we all made some good progress. Remember it's a process...and there are no right or wrong answers. God doesn't expect perfection!

Friday, November 16, 2007

Our Bodies Are To Be A Living Gift To God

Romans 12:1-2 (NLV)
1 Christian brothers, I ask you from my heart to give your bodies to God because of His loving-kindness to us. Let your bodies be a living and holy gift given to God. He is pleased with this kind of gift. This is the true worship that you should give Him. 2 Do not act like the sinful people of the world. Let God change your life. First of all, let Him give you a new mind. Then you will know what God wants you to do. And the things you do will be good and pleasing and perfect.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Serenity Prayer

God, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardship as a pathway to peace; taking, as Jesus did , this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that You will make all things right if I surrender to Your will; so that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next.

In Jesus' Name, Amen



-Reinhold Niebuhr

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

What are you saying to yourself?

What we say to ourselves is powerful! Listen to the voice in your head and see if you can't turn some of the negatives into postive, helpful statements. Here are some examples:

This is hopeless.... I can't! I'm paralyzed with fear!
Act As If

I've got to understand everything before I do anything.
Analysis Is Paralysis

I've got to fix it now! It's time to get running.
Don't Just Do Something, Sit There

I'm bad. I'm unworthy. I must whip myself into shape.
Easy Does It

I've got to do it all at once. Who needs priorities?
First Things First

My life depends on it!
How Important Is It?

It seems really complicated...
Keep It Simple

I've got to hang on to it... I don't trust...I must do it myself.
Let Go And Let God

I don't want to hear it. I already know it. I know everything.
Listen And Learn

It drives me crazy when people do that.
Live And Let Live

It's too much for me... I feel overwhelmed by the future.
One Day At A Time

I've got to do everything perfectly. I've got to be perfect.
Progress Not Perfection

I feel like I will die if I don't get some relief.
This Too Shall Pass

I can’t believe he/she did that to me. I will get revenge.
Hurt People - Hurt People

It’s not possible for good to come out of this situation.
God Never Wastes A Hurt

Here I am, back in the same mess again.
Nothing Changes If Nothing Changes

This is not working for me. I give up.
Don’t Quit Before the Miracle

I am so mad I can’t even think straight.
Those Who Anger You Control You

I won’t stop until I prove that I am right.
Do You Want To Be Right - Or Well?

My mind is running in a million different directions.
Keep The Main Thing -The Main Thing

Sunday, November 11, 2007

2 Corinthians 5:17

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

Anger Self Evaluation

The following inventory can help you determine whether your anger is reaching a destructive level in your life.

• I become impatient easily when things do not go according to my plan.
• I tend to have critical thoughts toward others who don't agree with my opinions.
• When I am displeased with someone I may shut down any communication with them or
withdraw entirely.
• I get annoyed easily when friends and family do not appear sensitive to my needs.
• I feel frustrated when I see someone else having an easier time than me.
• Whenever I am responsible for planning an important event, I am preoccupied with how I must manage it.
• When talking about a controversial topic, the tone of my voice is likely to become louder more assertive.
• I can accept a person who admits his or her mistakes, but I get irritated easily at those who refuse to admit their weaknesses.
• I do not easily forget when someone does me wrong.
• When someone confronts me with a misinformed opinion, I am thinking of my comeback
even while they are speaking.
• I find myself becoming aggressive even while playing a game for fun.
• I struggle emotionally with the things in life that aren't fair.
• Although I realize that it may not be right, I sometimes blame others for my problems.
• More often than not, I use sarcasm as a way of expressing humor.
• I may act kindly toward others on the outside, yet feel bitter and frustrated on the inside.

If you recognize 4-8 of the above, your anger is probably more constant than you would like. If you identified with 9 or more boxes, there's a strong possibility that you've struggled with periods of anger or rage, whether you're aware of it or not.

(Adapted from The Anger Workbook, written by Dr. Les Carter and Dr. Frank Minirth)

Friday, November 9, 2007

Characteristics of Survivors of Abuse

Survivors of Abuse often…
¨ Hesitate to identify themselves as victims of abuse.
¨ Feel isolated, depressed, worthless, shameful and helpless to change.
¨ Struggle with negative feelings about God.
¨ Condemn themselves as responsible for the abuse.
¨ Deny that being abused in the past somehow affects present
circumstances.
¨ Lack self-control; feel defeated in areas of compulsive behaviors.
¨ Feel angry and/or bitter.
¨ Have trouble with authority figures.
¨ Have difficulty trusting others or place unwarranted trust in unsafe
individuals.
¨ Lack self-worth.
¨ Are preoccupied with thoughts of what it means to have a “normal”
relationship with others: friends, family, the opposite sex.
¨ Lack a healthy sexual identity.
¨ Act in sexually inappropriate ways.
¨ Question their self-identity—“Who am I?”
¨ Question whether life has a purpose or is worth living.
¨ Feel “at home” in crisis situations.
¨ Struggle with perfectionism or “all or nothing thinking”.
¨ Desire or fantasize about a better life.

If you're a survivor of abuse join us at Celebrate Recovery, Wednesday nights at 7:00pm, at the McKnight Road Church of Christ (click on the link for directions). Celebrate Recovery provides a safe environment for real life change in Jesus Christ, as we work through specific biblically-based recovery steps in the context of Christian community. We recognize the truth that we need each other to grow personally and spiritually.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Frequently Asked Questions

What is Celebrate Recovery?
Celebrate Recovery is a nationwide recovery program based on God’s Word, the Bible. Christ began His sermon on the mount by stating eight ways to be happy, commonly referred to as "The Beatitudes." These eight principles are God’s road to recovery, wholeness, growth and spiritual maturity. Celebrate Recovery holds weekly “Open Meetings” on Wednesday nights. We have a lesson and a period of open sharing focusing on the 12-step recovery process.

Is Celebrate Recovery right for me?
Celebrate Recovery is for anyone who is seeking a God-mended life. If you have a hurt, habit, or hang-up, it’s for you. Ask yourself these questions:
Is there a habit, substance or compulsion dominating my life?Is there an addiction that has become destructive?Am I being controlled by something that is blocking me from experiencing joy in my life?Am I codependent on someone else’s addictions or habits?Is a past abuse in my life preventing me from being able to move forward?If you answered yes to any of these questions, then we urge you to attend a Celebrate Recovery meeting and see if you find it to be a safe place to start healing!

What types of issues does Celebrate Recovery address?
Celebrate Recovery addresses all types of habits, hurts, and hang-ups. Some recovery programs deal only with alcohol or drugs or another single problem.

What is the difference between Celebrate Recovery and AA (or other 12-step programs)?
The primary difference is that Celebrate Recovery focuses on Jesus Christ as the true Higher Power and uses God’s Word as the authority in relation to the Twelve Steps. AA traditionally uses a general interpretation of a Higher Power while Celebrate Recovery ties in to Christ's teachings as given in the Bible.

Is Celebrate Recovery confidential?
Yes, the Celebrate Recovery guidelines maintain strict confidentiality to create a “safe place” where you can take off the “mask” and be real and honest without fear. Confidentiality is a primary principle of the program.

Does Celebrate Recovery cost anything to attend?
Celebrate Recovery is a completely free ministry.

Do I have to be a member of the McKnight Road Church of Christ?
No, Celebrate Recovery is a ministry for anyone who is interested in Christ-centered recovery. You do not need to attend or be a member of the McKnight Road Church of Christ.

Celebrate Recovery Principles

[Based on the Beatitudes]

  • Realize I'm not God; I admit I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable. "Happy are those who know they are spiritually poor"
  • Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to Him, and that He has the power to help me recovery. "Happy are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted"
  • Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ's care and control. "Happy are the meek"
  • Openly examine and confess my faults to God, to myself, and to another person whom I trust. "Happy are the pure in heart"
  • Voluntarily submit to any and all changes God wants to make in my life. "Happy are those whose greatest desire is to do what God requires"
  • Evaluate all my relationships; offer forgiveness to those who have hurt me and make amends for harm I've done to others when possible, without expecting any reward. "Happy are the merciful" "Happy are the peacemakers"
  • Reserve a daily time with God for prayer, Bible reading, and self examination in order to know God and His will for my life and to gain the power to follow His will. "Happy are they who hunger and thirst after righteousness"
  • Yield myself to be used by God to bring this Good News to others, both by my example and by my words. "Happy are those who are persecuted because they do what God requires"

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Welcome to Celebrate Recovery

Celebrate Recovery meets Wednesday nights

7:00pm

McKnight Road Church of Christ

2515 S. McKnight Road

St. Louis, MO 63124



call 314-962-7026 or 314-974-0873 for more information